Simon Robson – 4 poems 



Oh to be in love with blessed baby red sleeves,

no bad smells from the fabric,

Kentucky fried chicken left-overs

from the weekend shift, their eating habits,

takeaway tinfoil wrappers infiltrating the hairs

inside your nostrils, brain,

no irritations to your sensitive nostrils,

sneezing fits,

everything in one place, composed, clean –

all your investment strategies coming off,

a rich, fat wage and respect in retirement,

enormous cabbages on your allotment,

when I get there –

first find a safe work area, no hazards,

apply the brake,

secure Velcro straps,

everything clean, very hygienic –

no health and safety issues, loose straps.





A delightful Mini York Container,

hard to resist or beat,

even when I’ve got my eyes shut –

I’m getting rewarded, just over £10 an hour,

for my limited effort at packet sorting,

building baby red sleeves

for the Post Office, late shift, 

when all I require is less pressure, fuss,

stress, more time to relax and enjoy myself –

stop the loss of full-time jobs,

no more job losses –

please baby red sleeves, please.





I blame Theresa May 

in her plump necklace of pearls,

leopard-skin shoes,

the rising cost of inflation,

no increase to my wages,

corrupt Conservative government,

my rising bile, contempt for Mullers milk,

yoghurt and sour bread, about to puke.

Mullers strawberry rice.

Working in a safe area, no infringements

from managers, sharp plastic straps,

bad brake mechanisms, no labels –

a workforce facing redundancy,

zero contract hours, threat to pensions.





I want a bright, spectacular, 

full of exploding fireworks, future,

where I can stay drunk all the time

on whiskey, listening to Canned Heat,

Rollin’ And Tumblin’ –

PPI, hand-stamping, meter, mixed packet mail,

no more Mini York Containers, propaganda,

all the correct procedures, health and safety,

shifts, working patterns, spectacular –

I’m in love with baby red sleeves.




Simon Robson

By Heavenly Flower Publishing

Bindweed Magazine publishes two anthologies each year: Midsummer Madness and Winter Wonderland. Bindweed is run as a not for profit, labour of love endeavour by an author/poet couple: Leilanie Stewart and Joseph Robert. Bindweed can be found at

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